Stolen ring

My engagement ring was stolen!

bB's house in Muar was broken into.. twice!! Most of his numimastic collection is gone along with my engagement ring..

I'm so sad..... :(
It took us months to find the perfect ring, and we had to wait another month for the ring to be done, because we had to order my finger size, plus the engraving. Now it's gone.

1 more week till my engagement day. I don't know what's bB's plan is. All I know is, I don't think we can get the same ring done again in 1 week time. Sigh.....


What an unfortunate day... :'(((((
I hope someone finds that motherf**ker who stole everything and cut him into pieces!!! I hope he'll get everything that he deserves! What an asshole. GRRRRRRRRRR.......
Can't we live in an honest environment? I'm so depressed...


I hope nothing bad will happen after this.. Please pray my ceremony will go smoothly..

Baby's Formula Milk, Is it Necessary?

This thing is bothering my mind so much! I really shouldn't have entered the conversation, it's quite hard to convince stubborn people, and in the end I was just talking nonsense because I wanted to win. Yeah, I can be childish like that, when I get into an argument, but in the end I just left the conversation since it was going no where and no one seem to get my point. Okay, just so you know, this went on in Facebook.

The argument started because the vice PM stated that baby's formula milk is super expensive (some can reach to more than rm100) because the Malaysian Medical Council wants to promote mothers to breastfeed their child. First of all, he stated that the reason was based on MMC's proposal, it wasn't just the government's decision. But somehow that guy that was unhappy with the vice PM's reason said he was being unreasonable for the hike of baby's formula price, and that the reason was just plain typical and making the people look stupid.

I for one, did not disagree with that statement. As far as I know, yes, breastfeeding is not easy. I have seen mothers struggling to give milk to their babies while I was in the Obstetrics department and I'm sure there's no difference with Malaysian mothers.

I can't really tell you the details of the argument, but this guy and some of his friends who are fathers really slammed me. They said, not everyone can afford buying formula, why didn't the government think of those poor people, those hungry babies? One lady commented that only 5% of mothers can't breastfeed. Then he said what if those 5% are among those poor people? I mean, really?

Then another came in, saying what about after the baby is 2 years old. Everyone knows that you should breastfeed your child only until they're 2 years old. Well, that is if you're following the Quran, and you really should, but if you can't afford buying formula, you'd know that breast milk can go on until the baby is 3 years old. And plus, at that age, a kid can probably eat solid food. Is formula really necessary?

I've read an article saying that formula milk is actually the cause of child obesity. I know we'd want our child to grow up healthy but is it necessary? but how does obesity say about health of formula milk anyway?

I for one never took formula milk according to my mother because I was lactose intolerant. All breast milk, and when she was at work, I was fed with just mineral water. After 6 months, I was given fresh milk because I seem to be fine feeding with fresh milk and after 2 years old, I had Milo until I finished primary school. And then I just started to hate milk because it made my tummy feels uncomfortable. I started drinking milk again after I finished school, but I never liked milk anyway. My mother never gave me and my siblings formula milk when we finished our breastfeeding period. She always give FRESH MILK AND MILO. And we grew up pretty healthy, I must say. With great grades at school too. Again, the question rises, is formula milk really necessary?

The problem is, I've known mothers who don't want to breastfeed because they're afraid that their breast will look ugly, I've heard mothers who don't want to breastfeed because it's not trendy. It's because they chose to give their child formula, not because they can't breastfeed. And if you stop breastfeeding, the glands will stop working after a week, your breast will produce no more milk. So I'm not surprise why MMC proposed the price increase of formula milk. So that people won't buy them?

I know I am not a mother, and I've no rights to say how a parent should feed their child. But really, there is no way a mother who can bear a child will not produce any milk AT ALL. I think you could at least produce 1 teaspoon of milk. Every animal that gives birth can milk their babies! Unless perhaps they have some hormonal problems. I am wondering, how did our grandparents grew up? Did they have formula milk back then? Were there women that can't breastfeed? What did they do?

I asked my mother, she said "traditional massage" by the midwives. Well, if modern medicine can't make you produce milk, always go back to the olden days. They can't all be wrong, right?

There's another way, which is called "milk mothers", where another mother gives her milk to a child that is not hers. But there is a rule in Islam, where if the child is fed by the same mothers more than 5 separate times until the child is full, the child becomes "mahram" to the woman and to her children. Mahram means, you are considered as blood relatives and you can't get married to the woman who breastfed you and her children. I suggested that this be done among cousins, then that guy argued what if the child falls in love and wants to get married. I didn't do any research before going into that argument with him, but I said some stupid stuffs. Anyway, why do you still want to fall in love with that person if you know you can't marry him? Plus, medically and religious views as well, that it is unhealthy to marry among cousins. It is not wrong, but if it not good for your offspring why consider it? Then, they said that love is blind. And that it is God who made us meet our partner. I said, then it is God's will that they've become "milk siblings" too, if that's the case. Did he forget that only 5% of mothers can't breastfeed their child? and what's wrong if it's done among cousins anyway? How many of us marries our cousins? We're not even the royalties. And even royalties nowadays don't marry between cousins that much either.

He just fought me and fought me, and find reasons that my solutions will not solve the problem and that the only way to solve this problem is that if the government lowers the price of  formula milk. Because there is no other way to feed your child other than feeding formula milk and if the mother can't produce milk, she should just let it be and accept fate. According to him and all the men that was in that conversation.

I've been googling to find if it's possible for a child to grow up and live without formula milk and breast milk, if there it was possible for babies to be fed with fresh milk, but to no avail, I've find no answer to my question. I can't say my experience growing up without formula milk because my mother could produce breast milk.

So my question to you is, why do you still want to buy formula milk if it is so bloody expensive? I think it goes to show how you can actually afford to buy one. Because if I was a poor person and I can't breast feed, I don't think I will be living in Kuala Lumpur and I know I'd steal milk from the cow. Natural fresh unpasteurized cow's milk for my baby. I know, there is a way to avoid buying formula milk. So if you can't produce milk, find every possible way to avoid giving your baby formula, unless you can afford buying formula milk. But really, no ones likes a person who doesn't try but keeps on complaining.

Please tell me what you think of this issue...

If happy ever after did exist

I wish I did not care about you 

as much as I do now..
I wish I did not care about

all the things that you've said..

I wish I could ignore my feelings

I wish I could ignore YOU..

oh December, why are you so cruel?

So many unfortunate events happened in December.

There were so many people pissing me off, that I actually felt like blowing something up.. Fardia gave the idea: balloons. LOL! maybe. I think Pissing Anna off in December in an annual thing, because there was so many people pissing me off last December that I actually posted Lets Piss Off Anna Month. Let's see what will happen next December, then we'll decide if it's an annual thing.

I didn't really want to tell this, but I really need to let it out. My roomate's ATM card got spoiled and she doesn't have any back up account. So I lent her my HSBC ATM card, since my active account is Maybank. All my allowance and transactions are in my Maybank account. HSBC is just my backup account, in case anything happen to my Maybankcard.

So my roomate borrowed it. She transfered some of her money to the account, and I gave her my ATM card. My 'niat' when I did that account is also, if someone card got broken or lost, they can borrow mine. Well, the day happened. So. She asked my pin number. So I told her, and she asked me to repeat the number, I repeated the number, and she repeated the number, and she wrote down the number.

The next day, the messaged me, "anna, your pin number is (e.g) 112323 right?". I was like no. It's 113223. How the hell she managed to mess that up? I totally recall she spoke the correct number.

When I got back home, I asked her. She said she didn't manage to withdraw the money because she tried the number 2 times and got rejected. Yesterday she tried again, and now my card is blocked. *sighhhhhhhhhh.....*

I really don't know what to say. Part of me is actually quite angry at her but part of me is quite angry at myself too for not writing it down for her. She should have called me when it was rejected the first time, she should have shown me the number that she wrote down just to be sure OR I could have written it down for her, or I could have took the money out for her instead of giving her the power of my ATM card. So many what ifs.... but it had happened but I'm still very upset.

I called HSBC today, they said they can't issue a new card here in Moscow. Need to do it back in Malaysia. I thought they were an International Bank? So weird. So now, even I don't have a back up account. aiyaaaaa.....

Lets just hope nothing will happen to my maybankcard.

What surprises me yesterday was, MY ROOMATE STILL MANAGED TO GO SHOPPING!!!! She brought back 5 big shopping bags; including new handbag, new shoes, new clothes, and I don't know what else is in that bag... HOMAIGOD...

Thank God I only have 6 more months. My roomate is the most gullible and naive person I have ever met. You wouldn't even think she's 24!

The only good thing that happened this December is my sister's awesome 7A1B PMR result and our visa is on the way. I need a break from Moscow. *pening*

HERE'S SOME TIPS FOR YOU NEW FRESHMEN OUT THERE WHO WANTS TO PURSUE YOUR STUDIES OVERSEAS:

1. HAVE 2 BANK ACCOUNT. HAVE 2 ATM CARDS
2. BETTER YET, OPEN A LOCAL BANK ACCOUNT. IT'D BE EASIER IF YOU LOST YOUR ATM CARD OR IF IT GETS BROKEN.
3. OPEN AN ONLINE BANKING ACCOUNT
4. BUY A STUDENT TARIFF SIM CARD. So you don't have to topup your phone every 3 months or change your number every  year. It'll be easier to get the TAC number too.

Gimme A Sign

It's been a week now. I've not cooled down. I actually feel more pissed than ever! I'm not even sure if he's serious about breaking up or not. Because he changed his profile picture of us two in Rome with a very sweet caption. So basically, I'm wondering,

WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME?

Usually, after a fight, he'll let me be until he has cooled down or until I gave him a sign. Usually, I'm the one who goes back to him. So right now, within this week, I haven't exactly posted anything on Facebook that gives any sign that he can say 'hi' to me nor have I greet him in any way (chat, message, sms or even call). I just act like nothing ever happened. I'm doing my work like normal. Nothing's bothering me. I just want to see how much he actually cares about me, about this relationship.

Obviously I'm confused. Because he broke up with me. And then, he posted a profile picture of US.

I can't say 'hi' to him first. He was the one who dumped me!! I see him online all the time and I didn't even appear offline like I usually do whenever I'm pissed at him. So, what more sign does he actually need? Seriously, what does he think I am? A puppy? A doll? A freakin' cyborg??? sheeesh~!

For him to let me be alone and pissed for A WEEK says that he just doesn't care anymore for this relationship, but a profile picture of US??? wtf dude? get on with it. Why are you so freaking CONFUSING?!! Trying to make me piss off another week. That's so typically you.

S.A.J.

When your hormones goes ups and downs.

When everything else fails, and I keep on crying, you'd make it worst by saying "Let's just break up" and hangs up the phone.

How I wish you would just DROP EVERYTHING that you're doing and JUST PAY YOUR ATTENTION to me. All I want is just you and me always,
Give me affection,
I need your perfection..

I'm always 2nd to your everything. I should accept that by now. I really should. It's has been 4 years. But I can't. Because it's not fair.

I know why you can't stand that I cried. I know why you walk away or shut the door or hang up the phone every time tears welled up my cheeks. You can't stand the fact that you're a FAILURE. FAILURE TO ME.

You said, lets continue this another time, I asked you "WHEN? WHEN WILL YOU HAVE TIME? WHEN?!" and YOU SAID, "LET'S JUST BREAK UP" every time things get tough between us. Like it is the easiest thing in the world to do. When you can't figure out what I want, when you can't make the tears stop. It breaks my heart every time, but most time the words don't even have meaning for me anymore. Because you always come back. And I always accept you back.

I wish you knew, all I wanted was you. And I can see that you just can't give me you. You asked me to understand your situations, but you don't understand OUR situation. MY SITUATION.

Kau tak pernah cuba memahami aku
Cinta kau ucap tak pernah engkau tunjuk
Dan bila tiba saat ku kehilangan
Beban yang tak pernah cuba kau ringankan...

Maybe you'll come back like always when you've cool down. Maybe you won't. Maybe I'll be here like always. Maybe I won't.

grrrr... geram..

Sebenarnya, rasa macam nak delete profile picture dalam facebook yang ada gambar dia dengan saya. Sebab? sebab dia taknak upload gambar yang kitorang together. Kata nak simpan, lepas kahwin baru letak (tu pun kalau kahwin lah kan? Kalau tak, memang takde lah.)

Tapi........ ramai sangat comment gambar tu.. sayang pulak nak delete.

Siggggggggghhhh.. Yeah. I'm pathetic like that. >.<

LDR

LDR, bukan Light Dependent Resistor ye. Long Distance Relationship. ;P ok.. lawak bodoh..

I hate that we're far apart.
I hate that he's always seem so busy or make himself busy just so he can past the time without me.
I hate not knowing what he's doing at the moment.
I hate that he doesn't ask me how I'm doing.
I hate when he asks me to keep myself busy too.
I hate when we're on skype and he's chatting with someone else.
I hate the fact that he doesn't divide his time for me.
I hate that he doesn't know how to make up with me on line or on the phone.
I hate that when he feels like leaving, he just leaves especially when I'm upset with him.
I hate that he doesn't tell me about anything!!!!!

Oh God! I feel like strangling him! grrrrrrr... >.< I don't understand what is it that is so hard to comply to my needs! I JUST WANT SOME ATTENTION.. AND I'M NOT GETTING ANY! Our timing has always been off and it's even worse now! because it's morning when it's midnight, and it's afternoon when it's maghrib.. I hate this..

 9 more months.. Just 9 more months..

 

"I'm still in love but all I heard was nothing"

My Choice

I don't want to wear it just because everyone else does

I don't want to wear it because people asked me to

I don't want to wear it because of fashion

I don't want to wear it to feel proud

I don't want to wear it because of my husband

I don't want to wear it, then take it off again, then wear it again

When I wear it, I'll wear it with love

When I wear it, I'll wear it with dignity

When I wear it, I'll wear it for Allah

Because that way it'll feel forever

Hidayah itu milik Allah

so stop forcing me or in your words 'advising'.

"respect"

Mula-mula pakai tudung tutup seliput, labuh sampai dada..

Lepastu, tudung nampak rambut depan..

Lepastu, tudung nampak leher..

Lepastu, rambut jadi blonde..

Lepastu.....

Guess What?!

Because we had wait through the weekend to get my mother's TVIEXPRESS certificate verified, the list of hotels has been updated and the one I booked last week is GONE!!!

Btw, my mother's certificate is still no verified, so Mr. Uncle generously offered his certificate. And I had to go through the hassle once again of finding a new hotel because the hotel I booked 4 days ago has been updated with a new list of hotels. So the hotel I booked last week isn't in the new list! Am I making any sense? I hope you get the picture of what I'm trying to say. PLUS! All the tax & service charges of the hotels in the new list are above US$100!! NOT ONE IS BELOW $100.. I say this is cheating! wtf right?!

I just got my hotel confirmation email. I sent it like 3-4 emails to the hotel because I was worried. I just got a reply for the one I sent 2 days ago. And I sent like 3 emails yesterday. LOL! Now I'm embarrased. :"3

And the one Mr Uncle made with his certificate still hasn't got any reply yet. I guess, we'll know tomorrow or the day after. I truly hope everything will go well for this trip.

TVIEXPRESS made my life a living hell. I could have gone through hostelworld.com or booking.com without any of this nonsense. I wouldn't even have to change hotels!!

All my mom had to say was, "ada lah hikmah dia tu... "

Then Mr. Uncle said to me, mama said to him, "dah suruh buat booking lama dah.. last minute baru nak kelam kabut". In my head was like - Bb just finished exam last week, and we did do this as soon as our exam finished. I booked the hotel on the 23rd.. We had to find a cheap plane and trains, the best way to get there, we didn't know where we are heading first. Maybe Rome is our first stop, maybe it's Venice or Pisa or Florence. How are we supposed to know without proper planning? right? After our transportation system is covered, then we plan where to go first and how many days. After that only can we decide the date & place to stay.

And you know what Mr. Uncle said, "lain kali book hotel dulu, baru lah beli ticket kapal terbang".. Ya Allah, sabar je lah dengan uncle ni tau! Tak tau lah dia nak buat lawak ke tak.. tapi seriously, I told him, kalau flight tiba2 tak dapat, cancel or delay. Then burn je lah kan hotel tu kan? Pandai  betul la orang MLM ni. Pastu kita kene beli certificate USD250 lagi lah kan?
Lepas tu dia cakap, "jalan kaki lah.."  =.="

You know, there is a very thick border between jokes and stupid jokes. And I don't think Mr. Uncle knows about this border. Maybe he's trying to be friendly or even try to cool me down, and break the tension. But it just makes me annoyed with him. LIKE SERIOUSLY ANNOYED! and I'm just that person who is seriously easily annoyed with a person. Especially a person who makes stupid jokes in a serious situation. It's like you're looking at a dead person and laughing at him. Where are your manners?

And there is definitely a thick line between being friendly and somewhat perverted. Please Mr. Uncle. I don't mind if you're handsome and single. But you have a wife and you really shouldn't be saying/writing something like this:

"emmmmmmm lega dpt jumpa anna"..????? WHO THE HELL WRITES LIKE THAT? It grosses me out and scares the shit out of me! I'm really sorry. I know you've help me a lot with this (mainly because it gave me a lot of trouble), but seriously! I really don't feel like talking to you or even 'lega' to have met you. Maybe you're trying to be friendly, but I don't know you and haven't even met you and you're saying "emmmmmmm lega dpt jumpa anna".... O.O I really don't think I want to ever meet him! Even if he is a millionaire or something for doing this kind of business.

oh! saya stress!

Why can't travelling be easy?

I'm leaving in less than a week. Just got the train & flight ticket. Place to stay in Rome is partially done. Others? I have no idea. Trying to get Rome settled first before trying to get others.

I feel like screaming at Tviexpress!

Ok. What is TviExpress you ask? It's an MLM company that handles travel services. Sort of a travelling agency, but you have to pay USD250/year, or is it a registration fee? (I'm not sure) and you'll get a free hotel accomodation package. Anyway, my mother signed me up for this saying it'll make travelling easier. She paid.

What makes it difficult is that -

1) Getting the account verified. I had to sent in my IC copy to the person in charge and send him multiple emails to get the job done immediately. And since my mother registered it for me, EVERYTHING WENT INTO HER EMAIL. So I had to call her and message her to get my information! And what a hassle it was that day, she forgot her password.. =.=" So I had to call the secretary and ask her to retrieve her boss' email password. =.="

2) What was written in the certificate was not the same as what was offered once you click to redeem your certificate. What written on the certificate was that we'll get 7 days and 6 nights free accommodation by TviExpress. Being me, always scared of something new, I didn't click redeem certificate, I'm afraid if I have to pay anything or anything unwanted happen. So I kept contacting my mother asking her what to do, and she, being her, always can't give me a full explanation on anything, only gave me the guy's (who is incharge this TviExpress thingy) email. So I kept contacting him, asking for every single details. Until he just asked me to click redeem certificate, did I know that we had 2 choices between 4 days 3 nights in a hotel OR 8 days 7 nights in a resort. Unfortunately, there was no resort in Rome, so I had to make due with a hotel. That's where the problem came, because bB already bought our flight tickets, and planned for us to stay 7 days in Rome since the certificate said 7 DAYS AND 6 NIGHTS! wtf right??? Luar cakap lain, dalam cakap lain!

3) Finding a hotel with taxes & service charge under USD100 with good review is another hassle! oh! you thought you've paid USD250 and everything's done? Nope. You have to pay taxes and service charge according to the list of hotels provided in their website to the person in charge. So I had to pay another USD88 to Mr. Uncle to get my bookings finalized!
And the funny thing is. The amount that I paid USD250+USD88=USD338 for 3 nights and booking.com is offering USD 325.06 for 3 nights (Double or Twin Room). Ok, original price is USD 543.20. But still, I could get that offered price now! (nasib baik mama yang bayar USD 250 tu, kalau tak meraung jugak saya)

Click to enlarge

4) Ok since I've redeem my certificate, what to do to get another 3 nights in that hotel. I've decided to redeem my mom's certificate. The problem goes back to no 1 - account verification! My mom had this account for like months already, and with Mr. Uncle's procrastination, her account has yet to verified and since it's the weekend, they have not replied and fasten the verification process, and so I can't make my booking for the next 3 days! AND I'M LEAVING ON THE 29TH! ARGHHHHHHHHH!!! SETERESSSSS!!!

Oh dear mother.. how do you expect to promote this thing, when you can't give me any explanations on the booking system or even know how to use the internet or even remember your own email password? Because this business is using the internet and paypal and maybank2u to the fullest! And when I complained to her, the only thing she said was, "first time, memang lah rasa susah". Sigghhhhhh.... 

Hopefully, Mr. Uncle could get it done by tomorrow. If not, such a trouble for us to check out and check in again in another hotel/hostel/apartment. If mama hadn't paid, I wouldn't have bothered about this. But since she paid, it would be a waste not to use it either. Hishhhh.... banyak betul kerja! menyusahkan je! 

Really Malaysians??

Ok. So there was this pole posted by 1M Malaysians Reject 100-storey Mega Tower facebook page:
Where else would you prefer the government to spend the RM 1.4 million that the 1Pengguna Website cost us?

Here's the result:

Click to enlarge

ARE YOU F*CKING KIDDING ME MALAYSIANS???? 

1047 total votes, and 429 goes to subsidy for car fuel???

You guys would rather be stuck in traffic jams and pay tolls rather than taking an improved transport system or better education & healthcare for the future?? This is just absurd and totally ridiculous! I'm so upset with my nation...

BAD HAIR DAY!

So he's been bugging me to get my fringe trim and offered to do so. So I say to myself, well, why not? I trust him enough.

IT ENDED UP LIKE THIS!!!

AND HE BLAMED ME FOR EVERYTHING! my blunt scissors, me distracting him! WTF?!! IT'S MY HAIR!!!
WHY AM I GETTING THE BLAME?!?!

gahhhhhh!! now I have to clip my fringe everyday. and I hate hairclips.. T.T

Unmistaken

If talking to a guy (according to you "manja-ly") is such a big deal to you, I'd rather have sex with some random guy. Then it'll be something WORTHY for you to be upset about, and for me to be scolded. At least I know I actually did something wrong.. sheeshh!

Manipulated

Kata saya, "lelaki suka memanipulasi". Kata mereka, "perempuan tidak pernah memahami"...

I'm so pissed off with my boyfriend because he finished my can of lychee which I bought for rm18!!! and he blamed me because I didn't tell him, not to finish it off. wth???

Kempunan laici sangat2 skarang ni tapi duit kekurangan sebab dah hujung bulan... iskk.. sampai nangis2 tadi, tp dia buat "don't know" je.. sbb dia pon takde duit nak ganti balik.. aduuuhh.. sedihnya hati ni!!! T.T

pasal laici pon boleh gaduh sampai nak break-up. grrrrr... geramnya!!!!

Kerana Nila Setitik Rosak Susu Sebelanga

Last week Malaysian students studying medicine in Russia been hit by a hate wave by Malaysians when Berita Harian published it's front page about how incompetent overseas medical graduates are, especially those from graduated from Russia.

This news is not new though. I've been hitting with glares and cringes when asked, from which university, and I answered "Russia" since I did my practicals in the government hospital during my 2nd year and 3rd year summer break. But it has never been published to the whole nation before, it has been kept within the medical community for more than 6 years.

I think some HOs made an MO damn pissed off, therefor, he made a decision to published it in local newspaper so that the whole world would know about it. Stupid mistake I'd say. He/She made the whole nation afraid of going to the hospitals. As if we don't have that problem already.

Every year, there are more and more students coming in to study medicine here. The question is - Who approved them? Who approved their NOCs? Who approved those agents?. Why is the government keep sending students here? We're just trying to live our dreams and/or our parents dreams to become a doctor. Why are we getting all the blame? Why isn't the government getting these blames as well?

On the paper, they said, the russian graduates don't even know basic skills like how to measure BP, pulse and place the stethoscope on the chest. Really? I've been learning those since I was in 3rd year. If most of us don't know how, why are most russian graduates survived their housemanship and already became MOs and specialists? Yes, I admit we are lacking in practical skills. Even now, I still have trouble taking blood and I don't know how to put an IV line. Because for Russian students, they learn theoretical stuffs for 6 years and 1 year for their practicals only. As for foreigners, we study for 6 years minus the 1 year of practical training and can only learn them when we are doing our housemanship. So please forgive us for our lack of practical ability, but to say that we cause the increase of death, isn't that a little over-exaggerated? HOs can't cause death, because if we do, our licences will be annulled because we're still on probations.

And we are learning everything in Russian language, with russian classifications. So it'll take some time to know the shortforms in the patients history in local hospitals or the terms from the English textbooks. Life is about learning, and learning is never ending.

But to say that we never learn anything here is way out of line. I read, a parent complaining, according to his son that we don't learn anything here, that the lecturers won't let us see patients and they refused to teach in English because they're so proud of their language. Please realise where you are dear sir. You are not in England or Canada or Australia or US. I went to Beijing and NO ONE knew English too. Plus Russia isn't really a tourist centre, so you can't blame them for not knowing English and what is wrong with being proud with your language? And I do get to see patients. How do you expect me to write my patient's case report if I can't see the patient? He even said that Russia's medicine is 10 years behind. erm.. As far as I know, Russian medicine has existed way before Hang Tuah was born. Learn their history, do your research before making assumptions.

I hope to be a good doctor if not great. I still have so much to learn, but please don't judge me just because of where I've been. If my seniors can do it, why can't I, right? =)

God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead so why should you?

The truth is.. I have so many things to write, so many things in my mind that needed to get out. BUT MY SCHEDULE ARE SO F*CKING PACK RIGHT NOW!!! And My weekends are filled with sleep. So I really don't know when I'm able to write all this stuffs in my head.

Plus it's been really really REALLY COLD for the past few days, It's so hard to get out of my bed! And I've been sitting, doing work with my comforter wrapping myself like a shawarma. iskkk.. >.<

So sorry my readers. I'll write as soon as I can. Promise. ^.^

Ps: Did anyone saw the front page of Berita Harian on 15th February? Sedih giler.. marah pon ada jugak. Senang2 je nak judge orang mcm tu.

Resolution #5

INSTRUCTIONS FOR FREEDOM

1. Life’s metaphors are God’s instructions.

2. You have just climbed up and above the roof. There is nothing between you and the Infinite. Now, let go.

3. The day is ending. It’s time for something that was beautiful to turn into something else that is beautiful. Now, let go.

4. Your wish for resolution was a prayer. Your being here is God’s response. Let go, and watch the stars come out – on the outside and on the inside.

5. With all your heart, ask for grace, and let go.

6. With all your heart, forgive him. FORGIVE YOURSELF, and let him go.

7. Let your intention be freedom from useless suffering. Then, let go.

8. Watch the heat of day pass into the cool night. Let go.

9. When the karma of a relationship is done, only love remains. It’s safe. Let go.

10. When the past has passed from you at last, let go. Then climb down and begin the rest of your life. With great joy.

Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

page 194

Lets Piss Off Anna Month

I know most of you probably won't read this because it's too long but thanks to those who has time to read them.

Ok. I am so pissed off. It's been like "Lets Piss Off Anna Month" or something and it's not even mid December yet.

First, my bB. I rather not elaborate.

Then, there's my groupmates, but that story has been 2 weeks ago, and I want to move on from it.

Now, my juniors wants to act like they're a bunch of know-it-alls! I'm even upset to be calling them my juniors. I wont blame them if they gave me a solid point but they're not and they're making a fool out of themselves.

You see. We had a notice last week about our hostel payment which had to be made by today or you'll get kick out. The notice was posted last week at the notice board and also in the RSMU Malaysian Students Association blog. So the blog has been flooded with comments by juniors (I am very sure about this because no senior would be so dumbfuck stupid as this - pardon my french) saying that the notice is so short and they're from poor family, doesn't have enough money yet, bla, bla, bla with so many excuses.

Hello? have you realised that it is already DECEMBER?! Do you realise that you have been using the electic, the heat and water for FREE for the last 3 ½ months?

The thing is, if it's anywhere else in the world, you have to pay your hostel fees on your registration day or you won't get any place in the hostel, lagi2 kat Malaysia. Tak kisahlah IPTA ke IPTS ke. That's the rule. They're already quite lenient with us here.

they said give a little sympathy for those who are less fortunate. Hello sayang, if you don't pay your electrical bills, water bills, phone bills, whatever in Malaysia, ada ke diorang nak kisah kau tu orang susah ke tak? ada ke diorang nak bagi simpati? diorang potong je selagi kau tak bayar. Please live in reality, you are not a kid anymore!

Then they said, the student body lied to them saying that can pay in February for 2 sems straight (because right now the new hostel admin decides on 1 receipt per sem because there's so many students keep changing from big room to small room - big room and small room have different prices. and so it's easier to print 1 receipt per sem in case of any room changing sbb blk besar lagi murah dari bilik kecik, so kalau tukar from bilik kecik ke bilik besar mestilah nak refund kan kalau dah bayar full? duuhh~ harap korang yg baca ni dapat tangkap situasi ni. kene duduk depan2 baru boleh cerita lagi detail). The truth is the student body didn't lie to us. They thought that the admin is going to print the 2nd sem receipt in October or November but there were no news about it until now, that they found out the admin is not printing the 2nd sem receipt until next sem. we just have to pay the 1st sem hostel fee first. And the whole paying 1 whole year in February is a myth! MYTH PEOPLE! I don't know who created them. Banyak cantik, guna air, api, heater free2 utk 5 bulan? Inilah manusia, memang suka menyusahkan orang lain dan suka2 hati pakai barang free2.


oh then they hit me with "budak scholar senang la cakap! duit masuk bulan2". Mak aih, pegi situ plak! The fact that you are planning to pay the whole year in one lot says a lot about you being richer than me. Let me tell you something about students with scholarship or at least me. I DON'T ASK MY PARENTS MONEY SINCE I GOT MY SCHOLARSHIP. only when I'm desperate I'll ask them but it's rare. I pay for my own flight tickets, the hostel fees, the food i eat daily, my eurotrips and holidays, my monthly expenses, my petrol for my car, sometimes I even buy groceries with that money for my family when I'm home for Summer and I can still put the balance into my ASB. PLUS it's not like I don't have to pay them back!

I know a friend of mine who put a certain amount of her scholarship into her ASB, and the amount is more than mine. Everytime she wants to travel, or shopping lavishly, she'll sell nasi lemak within the hostel to earn extra money. I respect her because she doesn't depend on her parents and find other alternatives to earn extra money. Another friend of mine, make food mass everyday for his 'Paris Fund' because he's not on any scholarship. I respect everyone who wouldn't mind working extra hard to earn extra money, and we're medic students! Imagine to find time to cook for people!

These other kind of people, dah la depend kat mak ayah. pastu buat taik cakap tak cukup duit lah, parents miskin lah, apa lah tapi takde effort langsung nak tolong kurangkan beban mak ayah. All they know is COMPLAIN how unfortunate their lives are. Kalau miskin sangat, mak ayah tak hantar punye kau jauh2. Kalau nak sangat buat medic, baik buat medic kat Indonesia je. Living cost rendah, tuition fees pon murah.

I know for a fact, parents who decided to send their children to study overseas will always plan ahead, and keep a certain amount of money for their child's education. Do you think I'm stupid mister? I receive scholarship for a reason and I am extremely grateful for it. Extremely just doesn't cut it, its more like REALLY REALLY EXTREMELY GRATEFUL! Alhamdulillah...

I tried helping. I asked them to come to my room and I'll help them by paying them if they help me do chores. All they say is "dah la, Anna sombong. Kaya sangat sampai tak pandai jaga hati orang". WTH? niat ikhlas nak tolong pon salah. Tak tau lah nak cakap apa. Orang niat ikhlas nak tolong, diorang boleh cakap mcm ni. I know if you are truly poor you wouldn't talk shit when people want to give you help. It is so obvious that you've used the money your parents gave you for the hostel fees and you can't find anymore points to defend yourselves, so you attack me with your stupid mind. Tak ada hormat untuk senior langsung budak2 ni. If you can't respect me, I can't respect you.

Don't judge me saying I don't know what it's like being less fortunate. The fact that I am not rich is the reason why I pay my fees separately, 1st sem and 2nd sem because I need to store up the money. The reason you gave that you wanted to pay the whole year at once and the amount is not enough is bullshit! because the admin is asking you to pay for the 1st semester only! not the whole year! so if YOU ARE STORING UP MONEY, it should've been enough! open your eyes please! you're talking crap!

bB marah cakap, apsal layan budak2 ni? I just thought I'd help them open their mind... sighhh...

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.

- Dale Carnegie

Do you know why poor stay poor? because they're poor in their mind. Cheers people. Sorry for my outburst and thank you for reading them. I feel so much better now. ;D